Borscht meets Guacamole

Wow - was this fortuitous, or what? I have just found the man on Craigslist for our beloved Ekaterina. You know, the 27 year old beauty who sees red, has eyes of green and a body most harmonious? If you have not yet met Ekaterina I urge you to do so!

Now please meet Jose, Ekaterina's soul mate - at least in fonts:

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Come with me to continue

hello been 7 years in this country and I think it is time to settle, I am Hispanic and looking for a serious relationship and so have the good company to keep here that is very necessary for me assure you that you are going to be okay.

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Hey, I don't really recommend anyone really settle in terms of relationships, you know? I mean, it's only been 7 years since he's been here. Let's give it some time, eh? I guess that's his prerogative. But, I do like the part where he says it's very necessary he inform her she's going to be okay. I think we all need to hear that. I think Juan sounds like the perfect man if he can make everything be okay. Hopefully Juan will be okay, too. I like his selflessness. Hopefully he can deal with the fact that Ekaterina sees red. Hmmm. Maybe Juan isn't going to be okay. Should I be concerned?

Nonetheless, looks like I'm going to need a Russian/Spanish translation for: Bon Voyage Ekaterina and Jose. Live Long and Prosper!

I'm planning on sending several dictionaries as a first year wedding gift, being that it's paper and all. Modern day lists say that clocks are to be given the first year but let me just tell you, if you have a Chinese friend marrying, please do not give them a clock as a wedding gift. It's considered death. Been there. My bad. Never got a thank you note. I'm not even sure they're still married, much less living. Just don't give out clocks to anyone for any reason. It's not worth it.

mutters to self about how I should have kept that cool clock...